I'm Back and You Won't Believe What Happened to Me

Before I start, I genuinely want to thank you for your support. Even though I have been AWOL for a minute, y’all still waited and supported my work throughout. May Allah bless all of you for this and give you ease with whatever you are struggling with.

I promise that this newsletter will not only answer your questions but will also leave you inspired and energized for the upcoming weeks of Ramadan.

The past month felt like a year, and I’m not even exaggerating. Somehow, February managed to be my best and worst month yet.

Let me explain.

I hope you understand that I won’t be going into detail about what happened to me exactly due to its private nature. But there are two main things that have been going on this whole time: we moved due to a trial that literally kicked us out of our home, and my online presence that I have been building since September 2024.

At the beginning of 2024, I started contemplating how to change financially. I am a very simple person—whatever is enough for me, I’m happy with, and that is pretty much little, alhamdulillah.

But something in me sparked. I have always wanted something for myself—something to call my designs, my work, mine. I just never dared to take the step. I always thought I wasn’t enough, I didn’t know how, and just kept putting it off.

I saw the khayr (good) I could do, I saw that many of our problems would just dissolve if I figured out how to back us up financially.

I tried some things in the first half of 2024, and finally, in September 2024, I joined the community by sister Saufiyah. By December, I had my first viral video, from which you might know me (click here to view it).

By January, I knew what topics I wanted to put forth, how I wanted to transform people, and exactly what products I wanted to sell.

It was not easy during this time. In fact, managing everything around me was really hard. I felt the weight of this world being thrown onto me. I felt how the pressure was holding me down, and I also felt anxieties rising.

But I remembered. I am Muslim. Muslims don’t behave like that in tests.

From that moment on, the only thing in my mind was: have tawakkul. Trust Allah.

Because for the past year, I have been telling people how to have tawakkul. I have been giving the advice I was learning and benefiting from. And it helped a lot of people.

But now, it was my turn to be tested. It was my turn to prove my words. It was my test now.

So we went forth. We kept going. And by the grace of Allah, we have been blessed, alhamdulillah.

We managed to move to a new area. At this point, I’m just asking you to keep us in your du’a because of the ongoing trial, may Allah make it easy for everyone.

And then, while I was trying to get ourselves a Wi-Fi connection up in nowhere, the guy literally tells me: You guys have no connection up there.

What?

Let me put that in perspective: I have started an online business. We have gone through all of this only for us to be tested with the one thing I was putting all my hopes in?

Exactly. This is how Allah will test you. Just like He tested Bani Isra’il.

When they were commanded not to fish on Saturdays, Allah tested them by making the fish appear in abundance on that day (Qur’an 7:163). It was a trial of obedience and trust in Him.

And that’s literally why I was AWOL. I just couldn’t do anything. And that’s when it hit me. The one thing I have been telling people (and myself) but apparently I forgot:

Never put your trust in anything except Allah.

My rizq does not come from my online business that I’m building. Not from the work I do. Not from any community. It solely comes from Allah and Allah alone. Period.

And my attitude changed. Allah prepared me. Allah taught me that exact year. I knew the blueprint on how to react to a test, why it was there and how I can be rewarded for it. I just needed to act accordingly.

So, we kinda figured out a way to have a connection up here so I can continue my work. Honestly I think that I’ll be visiting the local bakery for a while and lend some of their wifi (lol), but I have 100% accepted it.

Why?

Why would I accept all of these struggles, worries, and problems? Life is so difficult right now, isn’t it? Life is too much right now, isn’t it?

Wallahi, no.

We have no Wi-Fi connection, yet the connection to my family, to Allah, and to the nature around me has been stronger than ever before. We don’t have many people around us, but that’s why my reflection has been better.

Allah cut us off from the (online) world. HE removed all the distractions I could not remove with my own strength. He did it for me, for us. Allah literally forced me to prepare for Ramadan in the midst of the chaos I was in.

And this is the message I want to put forth: have full trust in Allah.

I am 100% sure that Allah has been planning something better. I am so excited for what is to come.

I know life is harsh right now, but I know that life was harsher two weeks prior. And just as I’m looking back now, thinking about how far we have come, I will be looking back in two months and thinking: Alhamdulillah, we have overcome this.

What you guys don’t see are the struggles behind the screen. And I’m not saying this out of pity but to remind myself and you that not every person on the internet is privileged enough to just do the thing they love and continue with life.

In actuality, most of the creators I know who have contributed significantly have struggled a lot during their life or before their success. It's a process, it takes time, sweat, blood and tears but mostly dua and tawakkul.

And even through all of these problems, through everything keeping me busy, we are privileged.

We struggle financially, but Allah blessed us with opportunities to try to make money. We struggle physically, but Allah blessed us with cars to help us manage. We struggle psychologically, but Allah blessed us with Islam.

As Muslims, we need to change our perspectives on life. The first thought that should come to mind when calamities hit is: Alhamdulillah, Allah is testing me. How will I react?

This is our purpose.

And I learned this before. I am not gifted by Allah with strong iman or whatever—I literally sat in my room and actively researched all of these things. I wanted to know why.

Why do we suffer, and why like this? I remember a time where I could be asking these questions out of frustration. But not now. Not after what I have been through and not after what Allah has proved me He can do.

And once I learned my deen, once I embraced the truth of this world (and it’s a harsh one), the only thing left was to commit.

And here I am. In the harshest weather, I’m shining brighter than the sun. (Yes, that was cringe. Just accept it.)

But I mean it. I love this quote so much:

سيجبر الله كسرك

“Allah will mend your brokenness.”

And wallahi, there is nothing more beautiful than being broken & fixed by the Most Loving, Most Merciful, All-Knowing, All-Wise Rabb: Allah.

My love to Him has risen significantly during this time. Oullahi I cannot imagine a time I couldn’t understand trials. I don’t know why as Muslims we have adapted this western mindset of being depressed when life doens’t go our way.

Thats the whole point!

So, be grateful for your tests. Allah is mending your brokenness.

I have not forgotten your submissions on what products you want. As I explained, the designing part of them was stopped and delayed, but alhamdulillah.

I am working on it, and I’m genuinely interested in changing your lives too, in sha’ Allah.

There is also a project I’m working on, which might take me a whole year, actually. But I am really excited about this one since it’s a dream come true for me. I would love for you to see the result of that struggle in sha’ Allah, so definitely stay tuned for that.

And if you are interested in the reflections I do, check out my 200+ pages Tadabbur Guide (Qur’an Journals) with a lot of bonuses (and only for 12€) to get you started.

Ramadan is the best time to practice seclusion.

What are you waiting for? Start today!

As always, we have come to the end of this newsletter. Yes, it’s a bit chaotic, but I hope you could still take some advice and inspiration for Ramadan.

May Allah bless you all—I would love to hear your thoughts!

Until then, I’ll leave you

في أمان الله_{(in the protection of Allah)}

❦ Dunja ❦